Sunday, February 1, 2009

donkey on the edge

Our Kathy was a funny person. She was always repeating catchy little phrases for particular moments in life. One of my favorites was her “Donkey” quotation from the movie, Shrek. Any time she was talking about being stressed out, she would say she was “a donkey on the edge.”

Since her death, I have thought a lot about being “a donkey on the edge.” On the edge has been where I’ve been…on the edge, and seeming to barely hang-on-for-dear-life. Life has gone on around me, and the “busyness” of it has affected me like hearing fingernails scraping on a chalkboard. My nerves have seemed raw and exposed…and this has made me feel fragile…unable to take on a lot of extra emotional “stuff.”

Since Christmas, though, it seems I have “turned a corner.” Life (and my nerves) seem to be mellowing out…I’m more normal…less fragile…more ready to “take on the world. I can still feel “frayed,” but mostly, if I get enough rest, I’m feeling better.

I have been thinking about the “grace notes” that God has been leaving in my life, and I want to write about those in the coming days.

And for those “donkey on the edge” days, I just have to depend on Him more and fall into Him…that’s where I find rest.